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Faking It

March 4, 2009

My boy...ready for the Tooth Fairy to come and visit.

My boy...ready for the Tooth Fairy to come and visit.

One of these days, a certain little boy is going to outwit, outlast, and outplay us and it’s going to be all over with ‘cept for the crying. We have just spent twenty minutes in his bedroom in the dark…crawling around on the floor, searching gingerly under the covers and pillow, reaching as far as we’re able up under the narrow recesses of the bedframe…trying to find the “squishy tooth” that Lawson had gained as a prize in class last week. His newest, latest, most-brilliantest idea ever was to leave it for the Tooth Fairy, and see what she (he? er…probably shouldn’t go thereJ) might exchange for it.

 I warned him that she probably wasn’t going to be too enthused about a fake tooth. “She’s not coming out for that, Lawson,” I told him. “Don’t get your hopes out—she only comes for the real deal.”


Law and the Squishy Tooth. The Tooth Fairy will Luuuuuv this baby.

Law and the Squishy Tooth. The Tooth Fairy will Luuuuuv this baby.


He flashed me his special dimpling smile, the one that says “anyone will do anything for me if I just look charming.” “We’ll just see about that,” he said. Six years old! I swear it—“we’ll just see about that.” That’s a dare if I ever heard one.


After a lengthy, furtive hunt, we were about to give up. Duane was straightening the covers while I was peering at the mess of toys on the bedroom floor, thinking that maybe Law had decided to have a little playtime before sleep-time, and had accidentally left his squishy tooth on the floor. And then, a soft “Ha!” from the direction of the bed. Duane had found it, tucked securely into a flap in the pillowcase.


Now, every other tooth that Lawson has lost has been placed in plain view on the dresser beside his bed—at my direction because I once woke his sister up being the Tooth Fairy. (That’s another story.) So the fact that he had hidden this tooth, the size of his fist, coincidentally, in his pillowcase, is significant. Lawson had been asking a lot of questions at Christmastime about the reality of Santa Claus, and he was probably a bit suspicious about the Tooth Fairy now. No doubt he figured that the Tooth Fairy, if she was indeed real, would just know where that tooth was…sneaky little chap.


We quickly tucked a fake gold doubloon, along with a note written in a mystery handwriting, into the pillowcase along with the squishy tooth (the Tooth Fairy doesn’t want that thing!).


The note read: “You leave me a fake tooth, I leave you fake money.

Nice try! Love, The Tooth Fairy.”

Fake money. Fake Tooth Fairy correspondence.

Fake money. Fake Tooth Fairy correspondence.



Yes, one of these days, Lawson will manage to outwit, outplay, and outlast his poor beleaguered parents, and we will be forced to admit that there is no Santa, or Easter Bunny, or Tooth Fairy. We will be forced to tell The Truth. Poor betrayed kids. I almost feel guilty.

3 Comments leave one →
  1. March 5, 2009 7:44 am

    That is such a sweet story and I love the photos. 🙂

  2. hintonrae permalink*
    March 5, 2009 9:02 am

    Thanks…he was hysterical this morning when he woke up and discovered the Tooth Fairy’s leavings. Lucky for us he has quite the sense of humor–he thought it was hilarious.

  3. April 16, 2009 8:56 am

    I found your site randomly through Condron. I had a friend who I played a little ‘tooth fairy’ joke on a little while ago. This story reminded me of it, it made me laugh:

    By the way, you don’t have to read about it, I just thought of it after reading over this experience.

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