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September 27, 2009

I had a cuckoo dream last night. It looped continuously through my dreaming cycles. I’d get some relief from it during my deep sleep cycles, then come right back to it during my REM periods. I remember waking and peering groggily at the clock around 6 a.m. (no mean feat for my near-sighted self) then letting my head drop heavily back onto the pillow, thinking “not time to get up…dangit.”


“They” say confession is good for the soul, so I’ll preface this odd tale by stating a few pertinent facts:


A) We live near the Peaks of Otter


B) Friday I discovered a couple of fraudulent internet charges on my checking account that I’m still working to discover the source of and get cleared up. I have to get a new debit card and who knows what else. Until it’s cleared up, I have frozen my checking account. Obviously (you think?) it’s weighing on my mind.


C) I think I might have ADHD. (HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.)


D) I teach teenagers.


E) I have a perpetual craving for vanilla chai lattes.


I think that’s everything pertinent, so here goes:


My Twilight Zone


Duane and I were escorting some weird teenage Goth chick that I have no recollection of knowing up to the Peaks of Otter. Once there, we entered a lodge-restaurant-store type building (also that I have no recollection of ever seeing). There’s this long counter, and people serving vanilla chai lattes and other coffee drinks, food, and market-type foods. We have no interest in hiking or anything. We’re just there for food purchases. I don’t even have my camera with me.


There are chalkboard menus over the counter, and a bored looking girl behind the counter waiting to take our order. It’s fairly early in the day—around 9:30 or so—but that really wouldn’t matter. I just want a vanilla chai latte. The girl with us, though, wants a full lunch meal. Now, the menus are very clear. You can get a cheap-o style lunch for a $1.10, or a big meal for $8.95. At 9:30 in the morning, I really feel like she ought to go the cheap route if she’s going to get lunch. Just my opinion.


Duane, never long on patience, gets frustrated, hands me a twenty. “This is for both of you,” he tells me, speaking very slowly, as if he’s talking to Autumn. “It has to last all day. You don’t have access to your account right now, you know, so don’t waste it! Make it last!” I turn back to Surly Goth Girl. We still can’t agree on what she’s going to eat.


I really want my vanilla chai latte. I turn back to Duane, who’s disappearing out the door. I look at the bored counter girl, the other patrons waiting. “But I have ADD!” I yell. “Don’t leave me alone with this chick!”


It’s at that moment that I wake up, or loop into deep sleep, over and over. Strange, huh? I’ve also dreamed about Duane jumping up and down to make the cake fall and snakes in the bed. I’ve actually made Duane get out of the bed for that one, while I slept blissfully on.


Anyway…I’m back. I’ve been a little overwhelmed the last couple of weeks, and blogging has felt like more of a “do I have to?” than a “man, I can’t wait.” Thus…I just haven’t. I have a whole litany of Lawsonisms, though, that I’ll be springing on you over the next week. So gird yourselves. The laughing might hurt you. I’ll probably start with the farting incident.


Until next time.

2 Comments leave one →
  1. September 30, 2009 10:00 pm

    Wow, and all my dreams are about werewolves and getting torn to pieces…

  2. hintonrae permalink*
    October 4, 2009 1:10 pm

    My kingdom for a werewolf…

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